When things calm down, I'll...

March 2025

"Never give from the depths of your well, but from your overflow."

-Rumi

Have you heard yourself say this too?

“When I complete this, I will (insert some way of caring for Self)…

“When I am done supporting this other person, I can…

“When this chapter ends…

“When…

“Once…

“After…

“Tomorrow…

“Next quarter…

What do I usually put off?

Not my responsibilities.  Not showing up for others.  Not the infinite list of things I “need” to do right away. Me.

My wellness.  My practice.  My harmony.

It’s a sneaky default pattern that shows up now and then.  It often happens when I’m feeling depleted, overwhelmed, or unwell.  It takes me hearing myself say it several times before I recognize that it's returned.  I’m no longer prioritizing myself in my life. 

I commit myself to things and elevate them to greater importance than my own well-being.  Then I tell myself that by doing those things, I am somehow helping myself.  It’s not real. 

I also convince myself that I don’t have the time to do the few things I need to feel healthy, supported, vibrant, and powerful. Even though the time required on the front end of taking care of oneself is often profoundly less than the time we waste while we ineffectually push through, caffeinate, and struggle to get to the end on less than we really need. 

Of course, we never get to the end because there’s always something in process and on its way to us – that’s life!

When I start to see this pattern emerge again, I pause. 

I breathe.  

I smile.

Something old is here, and each time it visits, I get better and quicker at recognizing it and shifting.  You can too! 

This is my life!  Who is in charge? 

Are you putting something off right now?  Is it you? 

Is it mental brightness, emotional clarity, physical wellness, your own freedom, joy, or light? 

If you had what you’ve been putting off right now, would it make everything you’re trying to do significantly better, easier, and more pleasant to handle?

I’m painting with broad strokes, and I know it.  There’s so much beauty in our differences and some of us are in a place where we are feeling safe, whole, and empowered.  YES!

But if this is resonating with you, please sit with it for a minute.  Notice your feelings.  Notice your acceptance or resistance.  Notice if you’re inclined to face it head-on, want to fight it, want to get away, or just feel stuck. 

I’m especially concerned that for many of us, what we’re putting off is our mental health and contentment with life.  A startling number of people will prioritize everything else before making the time and investment in this for themselves.  Businesses will invest in every other system and perk, even outside consultants, before tackling what could really support employee happiness, productivity, and longevity.  Are we focusing on the right things?

As I said, when I notice this pattern, I pause.  If you’re noticing it, I hope you will too.  It’s something we can do together, but even if it’s not with me, my wish is for you - my community - to take the time to work through this for yourself! 

You are valued. 

You are powerful. 

Thank you for being.